Well I was playin’ a gig in Ramona California
When the wife rang me up said I thought I better warn ya’
That a fire broke out at the Pine Hills Chicken Ranch
About a half a mile away as the rooster flies
The smoke and the flames were beginning to rise
And it’s a little too close for comfort to take a chance
So I asked her if she needed me to come home
She said not yet honey I can do it on my own
And the wind is in our favor at least so far
Then she grabbed some papers from an old file drawer
As she loaded up the horses through the trailer door
And then she threw the old dog and some clothes into the car
Well about that time the sirens were heard
And she could hear some squawkin’ from the feathered birds
As they moved them from the coups into the crates
Then they threw them on the back of a flatbed truck
As they pumped in 20 gallons from a diesel pump
And then they headed down the 67 grade
Evacuatin’ chickens, what the Dickens
Feathers was flyin’ like snow fallin’ down
Well they’re truckin’ cluckers, loadin’ up them suckers
And haulin’ them to the other side of town
And when they finally arrived at the other side of town
The driver whipped a u-ee and he turned it around
‘Cause he got the word that the blaze had just been doused
Seems the firemen held it to an acre and half
With the help of all the volunteer staff
And they saved the coups, a shed, and the old outhouse
But on the way back home the truck caught fire
And it was burnin’ through the cages and the chicken wire
But the driver snuffed it out and just in time
Well it might have been a spark from a cigarette butt
Or spontaneous combustion from the chicken stuff
But I suppose there’s just no logical reason or rhyme
And when he got back home to the chicken place
You should have seen the old foreman’s face
When he’d heard about what happened on the route
Well the driver’s head rolled like a tractor tire
‘Cause they discovered that he started the original fire
As foreman proceeded to yell and scream and shout

Evacuatin’ chickens, what the Dickens
Feathers was flyin’ like snow fallin’ down
Well they’re truckin’ cluckers, loadin’ up them suckers
And haulin’ them to the other side of town
So if you’re gonna go to work on the chicken ranches
Don’t rub two sticks or play with matches
That’s the moral of the story it’s simple but true
And if you’re startin’ fires in R-Town Ramona
We’ll stick you on a bus to Cucamonga or Pomona
Neither fish nor fowl has any place for you
Evacuatin’ chickens, what the Dickens
Feathers was flyin’ like snow fallin’ down
Well they’re truckin’ cluckers, loadin’ up them suckers
And haulin’ them to the other side of town
Well R-Town just don’t want your kind around
In Ramona, California, USA

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